Thursday

January 30, 2024

 

            When your mother had cancer, your father had cancer, your brother had cancer, and you’ve been living the last 19 years with a medical condition that can lead to cancer, it’s not a great shock when you hear from your doctor that you have cancer. When you’ve also had numerous basal cell carcinomas and squamous cell carcinomas removed it’s not a surprise when it’s your dermatologist sharing the news. What was surprising was finding out that the cyst you had removed wasn’t a cyst but was a rare form of cancer called merkel cell carcinoma.

            Merkel cell carcinoma only affects 4 people out of a million. It can also be very aggressive and deadly.  It was the type of cancer that killed Jimmy Buffett. If it’s found early, there’s a 75% chance of living 5 or more years. My father died from a rare form of skin cancer called mycosis fungoides.  Not exactly the family legacy I wanted to follow. They didn’t know what my father had for 12 years so I’m grateful that my diagnosis came quick.

            I had the phone on speaker, so Cathy heard everything with me.  Obviously, we were thrown for a loop at first, as I presume most families are when they receive a cancer diagnosis. I can honestly say that I wasn’t depressed or angry upon receiving the news. Instead, I thought of the love God has shown me over the years. God has blessed me with such a great life that whenever it might end, I can’t complain. My great-grandfather, grand-father, and father all died between 50-51.  I’ve been blessed with 14 “bonus” years, so far. I spent 45 years single. I’m now 18 ½ years into a wonderful marriage with the most amazing woman that God brought into my life. I had a wonderful career as a teacher, and God led me to retirement at just the right time. I have great friends that I know will be praying for me, and available for me if and when I need them.

        I was trying to remember why the name merkel sounded familiar.  First, it's the last name of the German chancellor. Second, it's the last name of a baseball player from the early days of the sport who became infamous for a baserunning blunder.  His nickname became "Bonehead Merkel." Last, there are two Christmas movies about an angel, played by Doris Roberts, named Mrs. Miracle, but pronounced merkel. 

            Even though the outlook is iffy, I’m going to be a hopetimist (one of my church’s favorite words) and pray for many years to come.  We don’t know what next steps will be yet.  The dermatologist is going to set me up with a surgical oncologist and we will go from there.

        Cathy is doing okay, too.  It's probably rougher on her at this point than me but she too is leaning into her faith and trust in the Lord's plans. 

Psalm 23:4

    Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 

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